Why do food products like “Pancakes & Sausage Bites” exist?

Recently I started shopping at Grocery Outlet. I love popping in and finding that they have acquired a batch of goat or other interesting cheese and are offering it for less than half the price at the other grocery stores in the area. So when I saw them selling Jimmy Dean “Pancakes & Sausage Bites” for $2.99, compared to the $9.98 it purportedly sells for at typical stores, I decided to buy a box. Even at that deeply discounted price they aren’t worth it.

Start with the box which makes it look like they’re an inch in diameter. In reality they’re about half the size of a McDonalds Chicken McNugget. The box says a serving is six pieces which is 230 calories of which 100 is from fat. As usual the suggested serving size is far less than a typical person will eat (which is probably closer to ten pieces). There’s a reason you see the phrase “shown actual size” on so many packages. It’s because of deceptive shit like this.

But what about the taste? What taste? The “sausage” is so finely ground it has no texture and apparently they don’t add any seasoning. The box says “maple sausage links made with chicken and pork added”. Notice the odd phrasing. The ingredients also include oat bran and oat fibre. If there is any pork present it’s apparently in microscopic amounts. The “pancake” around the sausage is only marginally more interesting. Its main ingredients are at least what you’d expect: whole grain wheat flour and water.

And unless you microwave them, not recommended, this product doesn’t save any time. Cooking in an oven takes fifteen minutes. In that time I can cook a couple of good sausage links or patties, real pancakes, and an egg over easy. Sure, I’ll have a mixing bowl, frying pan, and spatula to wash. But at least I’ll have eaten something that was tasty enough to make that cleanup worthwhile. Unlike Jimmy Dean “pancakes and sausage bites” which are thoroughly unmemorable.

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Kurtis Rader

I’m first and foremost a Secular Humanist and Atheist. To pay the bills I’m a software engineer. When not working I walk or play with my dogs, read lots of non-fiction (and some fiction), and watch lots of movies.

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